March 09, 2012

Chicken Fills In On Drums

It was 7:04 in the evening when Chicken got the call. After a busy day at the shops and a long tram ride home, she was utterly pooped. The microwave dinner was standard protocol on Thursday evenings. 

She had set her plate on the coffee table and was looking for the channel 2 news when the phone rang. It turned out Barnsey's drummer had taken the wrong pills and was stuck on the toilet so they'd be needing a replacement for tonight's gig.

Chicken launched off the couch, grabbed her favourite Vinnie Paul bandana and flapped out the door faster than a swallow on speed. 

When she arrived at the venue, needless to say, there were complications. Barnesy hadn't told security she was coming. After a whole lot of faffing about, a crew member brought her through and rushed her straight to the green room.

There was a quick high five and an all-hands-in teamwork cry before the motley crew sauntered on stage. It was time for Chicken to fill in on drums!

February 27, 2012

Chicken Finds Religion

Like many of us in this modern world, Chicken one day found herself in the middle of an existential crisis. She had always been so optimistic, and spent most of her time enjoying life to the full. Like the time she drank a litre of spoilt milk... or the time she went rock climbing and reconstructed the opening scene of Sly Stallones 'Cliffhanger'. 

One day it just occurred to her that she had no future planning. 

Her superannuation was all tied up in different accounts that she couldn't keep track of. She had no savings plan, not even a high interest account. 

Most troubling was that she had no legal will and the thought of not knowing what might happen to her estate after she passed started giving her dizzy spells.

One wet and dreary day, she was on her way to an appointment with a financial advisor when she happened upon a strange looking man.  He was elaborately dressed with a robe and a funny hat standing inside the door of an equally elaborate and extraordinary building.

Intrigued (mostly by the hat), she hopped up the steps and into the very large doorway. 

Suddenly she was overcome by a feeling peace. She admired the colourful windows and the various scenes they depicted. Some of them were a little violent she had to admit, but mostly very beautiful. 

Then the man with the hat appeared at her side, and put his hand on her wing. "Welcome, my child," he said as the sun broke through and illuminated the space.

That day she found more than just a man in a funny hat. She found... Religion!